In the Emergency Services Anxiety is a very useful tool. It is a human emotion that lets us know when danger is near and when to react. On the down side it is hard to turn this emotion off when we go home at night. It leads to hypervigilant behavior when we are in our "normal" clothes and trying to foster the relationships with our families. There is a way to control this very useful but often damaging emotion.
First use your leave. You have to have periods away from the job. A good break of three days or so every three or four months will help to rest your system and recover to a semi-normal state.
Secondly, you must have a daily routine of management, exercise, time alone to decompress, spiritual renewal. All of these things must be part of your daily efforts.
Lastly, talk about what is happening and what you are going through with someone you trust with the information. Don't keep your family locked out, but no need to give them all the gory details either.